Softball season again

We are now in the full swing of softball and baseball season again. After a few weeks of practice, now nearly every Tuesday and Thursday is a game, or two games if Abby and Nolan are overlapping evenings. It's fun, mostly, now that the weather has warmed up. Ava and Max get a little squirrely now and again if there's no park, but they always seem to make their own fun.

I will admit, though, I do like watching Nolan better than Abby, mostly because I don't feel the pressure like I do with Abby. When Abby plays, I want her to be... perfect. I know that's not possible, and I know that's not fair. But it's the ugly truth, what can I say. So, I get so nervous for her. Not only do I want her to catch, throw and hit, I also want her to know how to base run, how to make good decisions when she gets the ball and I want her to pay attention to every play, every game.

She's 8. I get that. Organized sports weren't even in my near horizon at that age. And even so, when I think back to the sports I played, what I learned was teamwork, hard work, the sense of accomplishment of a job well done and wanting to do better when  I didn't quite measure up.Why do I expect so much from her?

But the really funny (and by funny I mean unfair) thing is that I like watching Nolan's game because, well, I don't harbor any of the same expectations of him. If he hits, great! If not, bummer, next time. If he catches, gets an out, pays attention, fabulous! If not, there's always next game. Why the discrepancy? Is it first kid, second kid? Girl, boy? What could cause that?

The upside is that I know it, so I temper it. I cheer for her but don't holler at her from the sidelines. I leave that up to the coach. Afterwards, I tell her she did a good job and don't rehash every play. I leave that up to Dave if he so desires. I remind myself that it's just a game on the line, not her entire life.

And then to preserve my sanity, when Abby and Nolan's games overlap, I watch Nolan.