And then there's THIS girl

She looks so innocent here, doesn't she? All Max wanted was a picture all by himself. She just kept stepping in and would not stop. 

Max thought he was along here...

But isn't she adorable?

She truly is great, and awful, and a handful, and funny, and the baby of the family. She graduated from speech and tested at the 90th percentile. She is SO excited for kindergarten in the fall and tells everyone. In fact, when she's throwing a fit, or talking back, or otherwise doing something I'm not so happy about, I tell her only big girls are allowed into school, and that I'm going to call kindergarten. It's better than threatening to call Santa! I get out my phone, pretend to look for the number and by then she's begging me not to call, saying she'll be a big girl. It's mean, but I love it.

THIS girl

Have I raved about this girl lately? If so, it hasn't been nearly enough. Despite the obvious entering of her preteen years, she's also helpful, kind, and considerate. She puts up with A LOT from Ava, and still willingly watches her for me. And brushes her hair. 

Here she is with Ava and Merritt, another little girl that Alina watches. We were at a kid bowling party, and Abby could be rented out as a party helper!

She's also really struggling on a school decision for next year. There's a new (as of last year) Charter School option that she could go to next year instead. It has a strange location (in a strip mall!), has only four teachers (which they call coaches) and it's somewhat self-directed, especially for math which is all online. They get an iPad the moment they start, and it's all wireless so they can project at any time and present in front of the class (without it really being "presenting"). They talk about the 16 recognized career clusters and give them exposure to all 16 through field trips and guest speakers and by their senior year they pick one to focus on, giving them a better idea of what they might want to be when they grow up. They also integrate the subjects into capstones. For example, in groups they made a prosthetic limb, studying the implications to people in Social Studies, writing about it in English, using math and science to create it. I love that it makes them think past the test they have to take. She would start out the school day at her regular school for electives for the first two hours of the day, and then go to charter school for the rest of the day, and then back to regular school for after school activities or the bus home.

She's worried that she won't have a "regular" school experience. That she'll miss out on high school. That she won't have enough people choose from to date (yikes!). That she'll lose touch with her friends. That after school activities will be awkward.

I don't think there's a wrong choice here. She was supposed to make the choice on Thursday, but I've requested to go watch a class on Monday just to see it in action, so will need to make a decision then. I think it will drive her crazy by then!

If you can't beat them...

A while back I had a really rough day at work. When I got home, the kids were just... on my every last nerve quite honestly. I wanted two seconds of peace and they talked and talked and talked. They weren't bad, they were just... kids. At dinner that night we had steak tacos and Max started spinning the sour cream bottle. Instead of telling him yet again to relax and eat his dinner, I declared "Spin the Bottle" and fun and games ensued. After all of this, I couldn't help but be in a better mood. Sometimes you just have to give in!

Wee!!

Ava wants to see too...

Abby looks like she doesn't care, but wait until Nolan's spin lands on her!

Pucker up!

Come on Abby!

Eventually, I think she decided she might as well give in.

Here's to spin the sour cream bottle for creating a good night!

Validation

Abby has truly had a softball journey this year. It started at the end of last summer when softball tryouts were happening and it's still going on. When softball and baseball season was over last year, it was a well needed respite. In fact, I have a draft post titled "Collective Sigh of Relief" but I couldn't finish the post itself. The whole season was just so overwhelming. Well, during softball tryouts last year, Abby didn't make her regular team from Jackson. And she didn't actually not make it, but they didn't tell her she made it either. They were considering other girls, but some from her team last year already got offers so it didn't make her feel too good. In fact, some of the girls were clearly not at her level, and that was really unfortunately.

So, we did what any good parents would do, and that was have her try out for a different team! There was a new West Bend team that was just starting, and it was affiliated with the high school (similar to our volleyball team), so Abby went to check that out. Fortunately, they called soon after and said they would be delighted to have Abby on the team. After talking about it for about 5 minutes, we gladly accepted their offer. Shortly thereafter, her original team called and offered her a spot, which we declined. (I'm out of blogging practice... I'm hoping this is making sense!)

Fast forward a bit... over the winter Abby had at least one softball practice a week, plus a pitching practice. It was good but got to be a little much. Her coach was knowledgeable but intense. There was a bit of disruption and ultimately her coach ended up stepping down. Uh oh. We were really wondering what we got ourselves into at that point. But, the assistant coach stepped up to head coach, and her assistant stepped up to assistant, and we kept moving forward.

The team (The West Bend Nitro) started playing games a few weeks ago and have been doing a great job. They're playing smart and winning most. Then came the game against Abby's old team. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous, but ultimately talked to Abby that this team is just a team, and come the next morning they would still be her friends regardless of what happened. To make a long story short, we won! It wasn't a huge win, but it was strong enough, and Abby had some great hits and plays. Very nice to see!

But ultimately, I felt like our decision to play with The Nitro was validated that night. It wasn't at all because we won (even thought that was a nice side benefit). Instead, it was how the teams and the coaches interacted. Abby's coaches from last year were great--I cannot say how grateful we are to them for teaching Abby softball for the last three seasons in some aspect or another. But they are men and they are dads and they are intense... the same way Dave would be if he were coaching. And Abby does not respond well to that. In fact, she does the opposite. She shuts down, she doesn't listen, she tries to hard and she starts to play awful. And then they get more intense. Her coach now may not know as much about softball (hard for me to judge since I don't know!), but she certainly knows more about the 12-year-old-girl psyche, and I appreciate her positive attitude, yet still getting on them when necessary.

This was demonstrated even more in our last game we played. We were playing a team with a very fast pitcher and it was difficult for anyone to hit against her. We ended up finally getting someone on base, and Abby hit down the third base line for the RBI. And then... Abby started pitching. She did ok for the first two innings she pitched and then it was look out! In the dirt, over the catcher's head, you name it. Going into the inning we were down 2-1. Midway through we were down 5-1 when her coach finally pulled her. I believe Abby struggled that inning because she saw Dave show up, and anytime that happens, suddenly he gets in her head and she thinks too much. But regardless, the next day, her coach sent us a great email letting us know how proud she was of Abby, and that she's a great athlete and a great kid. I was so happy to get that, and to remember that that's more important than one poor pitching inning. That poor pitching was quite short lived; being a great kid who tries hard regardless and supports her team is the long term benefit.

Sophia the First

Sophia the First is a kid's show that Ava watches. She actually doesn't usually watch the little little kid shows at home because she's too busy watching the bigger kids TV shows like Lab Rats, Kickin' It or Jessie. But regardless, tonight she wanted to watch Sophia the First. Now, when the kids put TV on, I usually check out. I mean, who needs endless hours of mindless kid shows that we've seen a million times? (Not that I let them watch endless hours, but still...) I usually try to do something else (clean something, pick something up... even though Dave doesn't think that's true at all!), but Ava usually wants me to sit with her so I grab my phone, check my email, catch up on Facebook, play some games. And I stay that way until the kids go to bed. And then many times after the kids go to bed. Often times, I also wake up the next morning, check my email, check Facebook (because I'm certain big things have happened between the hours of 10:00 pm and 6:00 am) and then maybe play some games.

Well, I'm done. I used to call it "my relaxation time" but now am going to refer to it as "my waste of time." I'm taking my games off of my phone (but leaving the kid games... I do need to entertain them at restaurants despite the purists saying that you shouldn't have to do that). Tonight, I sat with Ava and I actually watched Sophia the First. The show didn't get any better, I reassure you. However, I actually engaged with Ava and when I was tired of watching it, we played a game instead. I think I tend to forget that even what seems like a waste of my time can be a big deal when I'm doing it with the kidlets.

And, one more time I'm going to try to commit to the blog. It's been tough lately, but I got my annual book of blog posts. The book was ridiculously small. Compared to previous years it was laughable. Must.Do.Better!

Full on pre-teen

On a fairly regular basis (at least more regularly than I'd probably like), Abby tells me about so-and-so who is "going out with" so-and-so (translation: they never talk to each other because they would like, die of embarrassment). Some girls have been going out with some boys since 4th grade. For others it's very new. For Abby it's confounding, I think. She doesn't have much interest, although she's very quiet about it. I think she tells me she's not interested in anyone because she knows that I think she's much too young for that. We talk often about the fact that you don't have to "date" someone just because you don't want to hurt their feelings. You only date someone because you actually want to. You don't have to be mean, but you have to keep your own self-interests at the forefront. And she tells me often that that's the same advice she gives her friends when they're debating whether to go out with someone or not.

Now, tonight I was talking to another mom of twin girls in her class. Apparently there were two sixth grade girls who went on a double date with two sixth grade boys. The boys went to the movie theater, bought tickets, the girls got dropped off, and they went to the movies together. In sixth grade! I am amazed at that. A DATE? Well, when we got home I mentioned this to Abby. She said no way. She knew about one of them but no way did the other girl go because she didn't even like that boy. I jokingly made a comment that I know more than she does about what's going on in the social lives of her friends, to which she promptly and very forcefully said, "You really need to get out of my sixth grade life."

Well then. I shall gracefully exit. But I can't promise I won't make the occasional cameo!

A pedicure with the neighbors

Awww! I was looking at my drafts, and found this post from last summer that I never published! Ava getting a pedicure from Jenny our neighbor. How fun! I particularly like the second picture where all the boys are fascinated. 

Fun sports weekend!

The weekend we got back from vacation, we had a busy busy, but very successful, sports weekend. Abby had her final volleyball tournament, Badger Regionals. We went in ranked 4th out of about 75 teams and came out ranked 3rd. We beat a team we lost two twice before and it was a super exciting way to end the season. Before the games started, the ref was uncertain if we'd have to take out Abby's braids or not. So, we started taking them out, only then to be told we didn't have to. So, they stayed half in half out for quite a while!

 Meanwhile, Nolan had his first baseball, or rather wiffle ball, tournament. It was a long weekend, but they ended up winning, so that helped!

 The parents cheered too!

 Proud coaches and proud parents all rolled into one!

Unfortunately, Nolan's first outdoor game is tonight and he has strep and croup so won't play, despite both his and Dave's disappointment. I'm not even sure I'll let him go watch at this point. And Abby has a tournament tomorrow but fell last week and hurt her wrist so she can't play either. Kind of a crazy opening weekend, not to mention it's COLD to play!!