Validation

Abby has truly had a softball journey this year. It started at the end of last summer when softball tryouts were happening and it's still going on. When softball and baseball season was over last year, it was a well needed respite. In fact, I have a draft post titled "Collective Sigh of Relief" but I couldn't finish the post itself. The whole season was just so overwhelming. Well, during softball tryouts last year, Abby didn't make her regular team from Jackson. And she didn't actually not make it, but they didn't tell her she made it either. They were considering other girls, but some from her team last year already got offers so it didn't make her feel too good. In fact, some of the girls were clearly not at her level, and that was really unfortunately.

So, we did what any good parents would do, and that was have her try out for a different team! There was a new West Bend team that was just starting, and it was affiliated with the high school (similar to our volleyball team), so Abby went to check that out. Fortunately, they called soon after and said they would be delighted to have Abby on the team. After talking about it for about 5 minutes, we gladly accepted their offer. Shortly thereafter, her original team called and offered her a spot, which we declined. (I'm out of blogging practice... I'm hoping this is making sense!)

Fast forward a bit... over the winter Abby had at least one softball practice a week, plus a pitching practice. It was good but got to be a little much. Her coach was knowledgeable but intense. There was a bit of disruption and ultimately her coach ended up stepping down. Uh oh. We were really wondering what we got ourselves into at that point. But, the assistant coach stepped up to head coach, and her assistant stepped up to assistant, and we kept moving forward.

The team (The West Bend Nitro) started playing games a few weeks ago and have been doing a great job. They're playing smart and winning most. Then came the game against Abby's old team. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous, but ultimately talked to Abby that this team is just a team, and come the next morning they would still be her friends regardless of what happened. To make a long story short, we won! It wasn't a huge win, but it was strong enough, and Abby had some great hits and plays. Very nice to see!

But ultimately, I felt like our decision to play with The Nitro was validated that night. It wasn't at all because we won (even thought that was a nice side benefit). Instead, it was how the teams and the coaches interacted. Abby's coaches from last year were great--I cannot say how grateful we are to them for teaching Abby softball for the last three seasons in some aspect or another. But they are men and they are dads and they are intense... the same way Dave would be if he were coaching. And Abby does not respond well to that. In fact, she does the opposite. She shuts down, she doesn't listen, she tries to hard and she starts to play awful. And then they get more intense. Her coach now may not know as much about softball (hard for me to judge since I don't know!), but she certainly knows more about the 12-year-old-girl psyche, and I appreciate her positive attitude, yet still getting on them when necessary.

This was demonstrated even more in our last game we played. We were playing a team with a very fast pitcher and it was difficult for anyone to hit against her. We ended up finally getting someone on base, and Abby hit down the third base line for the RBI. And then... Abby started pitching. She did ok for the first two innings she pitched and then it was look out! In the dirt, over the catcher's head, you name it. Going into the inning we were down 2-1. Midway through we were down 5-1 when her coach finally pulled her. I believe Abby struggled that inning because she saw Dave show up, and anytime that happens, suddenly he gets in her head and she thinks too much. But regardless, the next day, her coach sent us a great email letting us know how proud she was of Abby, and that she's a great athlete and a great kid. I was so happy to get that, and to remember that that's more important than one poor pitching inning. That poor pitching was quite short lived; being a great kid who tries hard regardless and supports her team is the long term benefit.